How To Respond To "idk" (She's Dodging)
"idk" usually isn't actual indecision — it's deflection. Maybe she doesn't want to pick dinner because she's testing if you'll just decide. Maybe she's not that interested. The fix: narrow the choices or just pick for her.
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4 replies that work
“'idk' is woman-code for 'you decide but I have notes' so — Italian or sushi Thursday 7pm”
Why it works: Meta-names the dynamic and immediately presents a plan.
“idk is a cop-out I'm rejecting. pick between two things I'll say: pizza or tacos”
Why it works: Playful push. Forces a micro-commitment.
“okay you get to be indecisive once per week and you just used it. my pick: [specific thing]”
Why it works: Takes the lead confidently. Works on 'what should we do' questions.
“that's fine — I'll surprise you. wear something you can walk in”
Why it works: Pure confidence. Sets mystery + physical frame without being creepy.
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Is "idk" a rejection?
Only if she uses it 3+ times in a row. Once is deflection. Twice is a test. Three times is her asking you to stop trying.
Should I just pick for her after "idk"?
Yes, 90% of the time. Women on dating apps rate "takes charge of the plan" as one of the top 3 attractive traits. If she pushes back, great — now you have preferences to work with.