How To Respond To "How's It Going" (Say More Than "Good")
"Good, hbu" is the death of this thread. Her opener was polite; your job is to inject personality.
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2 replies that work
“it's going okay — just survived a spicy espresso and I think my heart rate's back to normal. you?”
Why it works: Specific, funny, invites reciprocity.
“genuinely better now. you?”
Why it works: Flirt-adjacent, short, confident.
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Should I actually tell her how my day went?
One specific detail, not a recap. "Decent — discovered the coffee shop two blocks from me is overpriced theater, I'll live. How's yours?" Specific gives her something to respond to; "good" gives her nothing.
Is "how's it going" flirty or just polite?
Almost always polite. The flirty version is "hey you" or "miss me yet?". Treat it as the opening of a conversation, not a signal.
What's a better reply than "good, you?"
"Good, you?" is a conversation killer — you've agreed to exchange two words forever. Anything with one real detail beats it. One specific noun ("tacos," "a meeting," "my cat") opens a thread; "good" closes one.
How do I escalate after "how's it going"?
Slowly. This is a cold opener — don't jump to flirty in message 2. Build 3–4 messages of banter, then drop a flirty observation. Sudden register jumps from a polite opener feel weird.