How To Respond To "What's Up" (Reboot With Substance)
When she spells it out, she's putting a bit more effort in than the text-speak versions. Reward that with a real answer. The spelled-out version is a tell. "Wsp" or "wsg" takes half a second and usually means she's bored-texting. "What's up" takes three seconds and usually means she actually wants to know. That small difference matters: reply with the same depth you'd send to a friend who actually asked about your day, not a two-character volley. The "what's up" trap is answering literally. "Nothing" / "just work" / "chilling" all kill the thread. She's not actually asking for an inventory of your afternoon — she's opening a slot for you to be interesting. Give her something with a hook. Platform read: on iMessage "what's up" is usually mid-thread, a casual re-engage. On Tinder/Hinge as an opener, it's either polite-but-low-effort or she's waiting to see if you're worth more investment. Same reply strategy either way: answer specifically, add a question back.
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4 replies that work
“honestly, trying to decide if I should pretend I have exciting weekend plans or just admit I'm going to nap a lot.”
Why it works: Honest + playful. Invites her to share.
“not much — actually currently wondering what the odds are you'd let me buy you a coffee this week.”
Why it works: Moves to the date.
“recovering from a deeply chaotic weekend. tell me yours and we'll compare”
Why it works: Hints at a story without telling it. She'll ask to hear details or share hers first.
“nothing dramatic — though I'm debating one thing. quick: give me a reason to cancel my gym plans”
Why it works: Invites her to participate in your decision. Playful, engages her.
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Is "what's up" flirty from a girl?
Almost always just polite. The flirty version is "hey you" or "miss me yet?". Treat "what's up" as the opening of a conversation, not a signal.
Why does "what's up" feel so hard to answer?
Because it's ambiguous — social pleasantry or real question. The winning move is to pretend it's a real question and answer specifically. "Debating whether to cook or bail for tacos — strong vote either way?" converts her pleasantry into a real thread.
Is "what's up" a bad opener if I'm the one sending it?
Yes. It's effectively "I have nothing to say." If you need to reopen a dormant conversation, say what's actually on your mind — "still thinking about that coffee spot, did you ever go?" — instead of generic.
What's the best reply to "what's up" to keep the conversation going?
Something concrete + a callback + a question. Template: "<something I'm doing> + <tie to our last convo> + <easy question for her>." Takes 10 seconds and converts 5× better than "not much, you?".
Should I always reply to "what's up" with a question back?
80% of the time, yes. Without a question the thread dies on her next reply. The exception: if you just shared something interesting, let her ask about it first. Otherwise always end with a hook.